Why is it so difficult for so many women to receive a compliment? It seems to be most people’s natural reflex to put themselves down when paid a compliment. Think of how many times you have heard someone or been that someone who did not receive a compliment well.
It Never Gets Old When Someone Compliments Your Children
I was recently paid a compliment about my sons. They were volunteering at Vacation Bible School at our church. My older son, Matthew was a crew leader while my younger son, Ethan was his assistant. Ethan was one year too old to be a participant at bible school so he opted to volunteer with his brother.
I saw the woman responsible for the volunteers on the fourth of the five days of VBS. She told me how well Matthew was doing as a crew leader and that she didn’t have to worry about him. She said that he was mature and doing a wonderful job and that she thought of him as an adult in the group. I responded by saying thank you and then said, because I’m his mother, I’m not sure that I am objective but I think he is great too.
Hoping Your Child Is A Street Angel
A short while later she said, “I really like how you received that compliment”. She is the mother of four young children. She said that she finds herself not accepting the compliments of her children well. I am sure it’s because she has the knowledge of how they can be at home. My grandmother has often said that having children who are “street angels and home devils” is what you want. They save their best behavior for the public. They can’t be perfect all of the time!
This Street Angel Received Compliments
During my chemotherapy treatments, people often said “you look great”. I think people were shocked that I didn’t lose my hair and saying “you look great” was a way of trying to verbalize that. When I was out in public I guess I did look good for a cancer patient. My hair wasn’t visibly falling out, I was dressed in normal clothing, my coloring was what they remembered so yes, I looked great. Similar to the analogy with children, my appearance was “street angel, home devil.” For the week after chemo I’m sure I looked anything but great. I was confined to my bed for days, was lucky to have the strength to shower, certainly wasn’t styling my hair, makeup was definitely not being applied, and only on my best days was I able to brush my teeth. Yes, I looked great. Looking great was a term I heard from the start of my treatment. I wrote about it in a previous blog “Looking Good”
It actually became a source of humor for me with a woman I met because of cancer. She had metastatic breast cancer and she too looked great. She recently passed away. Although I did not know her well what I remember most about her was her beautiful smile. To me, she looked great because her smile radiated. It had nothing to do with her hair, makeup, or clothing. It was her smile.
A Simple Thank You Will Do
I am forty-five years old and people tell me that I look great. I don’t know if it’s a compliment because they think I really do look good for my age or if they think I look good because I am a three-time cancer survivor and maybe I should look broken. Now when people tell me I look great, I say thank you. I am working on refraining from launching into the thoughts that are lingering in my head about what I think about my hair or my skin or the outfit that I might be wearing. I am working on accepting the compliment gracefully.
You deserved it. All the will of fight and survival of yours it very encouraging…
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All i get from reading this is that you were strong enough to get you through it…
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